A little Friday post on some things I’ve learned recently…

1. I’m actually quite shy at times. And very confident at other times. I’m sort of a shy extrovert I suppose.  My shyness has been with me all my life, but only happens in a small number of recogniseable situations, and I’m trying to be OK with it. I’m actually a far better listener than I thought and I don’t particularly like talking about myself unless it’s something I’m excited or worried about. Like a child hiding under its mother’s skirt, I’m trying to see it as endearing.

2. I can get extremely stressed out without realising it. Once I know it’s there, life gets so much easier. I just need to cut down on what I’m doing, call friends to chat, try to do some yoga. Think about others not me. And more massages. What my life needs is more massages. And manicures.

3. There is nothing in life more surreal, amazing, beautiful and wonderful than someone you love giving birth. I never knew the feeling of love towards this wee munchkin I’ve never even met would be quite so strong.

4. You shouldn’t drink too much wine when you’re cycling; my favourite cocktail in the world is a vodka martini with 2 green olives; and I hate being told off.

5. You can’t assume that anyone – however close they are to you – know how you are feeling, even if you think it must be obvious. It’s far easier just to tell them, you’ll get what you want twice as quickly.

6. Most of my friends are flawed just like me (I love this article that @rachelhills posted). That’s probably why they’re my friends and why I love them to bits. If I can’t accept their flaws then that would mean I couldn’t accept myself and they coudn’t accept me back. But they do and I love them for it. And who the hell am I to judge?

7. Elton John was right when he said sorry is the hardest word. Second is probably onomatopeic.

8. How the hell did I get so competitive? Sometimes I have the ego and posturing of an alpha male rooster (the total antithesis of my shyness, who said women were easy to figure out). It’s so frickin’ schoolyard and something I need to shake off. It’s my life and I’m living it how I want to. I don’t need to match up to anyone or compare myself, and one-upmanship makes me feel guilty anyway. I need to work on remembering other people are on my side, we can work together as a team. Life is far sweeter that way.

9. Sometimes only a pizza and a bottle of red wine will do. Otherwise life on a low carb diet would be excruciating.

10. Having a built-in wardrobe fitted costs a lot more than you’d think.

10 responses to “A little Friday post on some things I’ve learned recently…

  1. Re: point 4, there is a bartenders’ rule that cocktail garnishes should always be in odd numbers. So, never two olives; one or three. Personally, regardless of this rule, two olives always looks a bit wrong to me. Sometimes I go for a twist of lemon, y’know, just to keep things interesting…

    • 3 olives would be EVEN BETTER, but I don’t care for your twist of lemon

      • Depends on the vodka. Another bartender was explaining to me how some vodkas work better with the savoury of the olive but others need the sweetness of the fruit. Each to their own of course. But there’s a lot of fun you can have fashioning different shapes from your lemon twist; a knot, a curl, a spiral, a slither etc. Go on, live a little, try a twist…

    • Interesting point re garnishes. I recently had some very good martinis, in New York 🙂 One (well, 2) at the Algonquin, Dorothy Parker’s watering hole of choice back in the day, where I had a double olive garnish in my dirty martini ; and an even better one somewhere uber cool on Bleeker St with a twist of lemon and a tiny sprig of thyme !! Controversial…..but very nice 😛 somehow thinking about martinis on a Monday back at work seems really rather naughty ! 🙂

  2. Onomatopoeic is even harder than you think…

  3. Arf, shyness. I’m annoyingly shy too, in certain situations, and am terrible at small talk, all the “let’s get to know each other!” stuff. I think you’re right though that shyness can make you a better listener. It gives you a kind of empathy I think, too – maybe because you’re more alert for ways to connect with people that don’t involve putting yourself too far out there? Or something. I’ve just moved to London from NZ and have started a new job, and it’s been an uphill slog. I don’t think I will ever “overcome my shyness” – best to just roll with it.

    • Totally agree and the more you worry about it, the worse you’ll get. Just best to accept it’s part of your character. I think it can be cute and a woman who is both shy and confident is a pretty powerful combination! At networking events I still wish the ground would swallow me up though! x

  4. *high five fellow shy extrovert*

    I love my friends for their flaws too, in fact I love my openly flawed friends more. My best friends in the world are often flawed in the same ways I am too which makes it all the better. So I don’t mind if they flake out on me and they understand if I flake out on them, which all in all just makes for a lot less drama and ultimately makes us closer.

  5. I am considered to be shy too, and I’m starting to see the positives of shyness more. Sometimes I feel like it can really hold me back from doing things I want to do though, so I’ve been working on confronting certain aspects of my shyness this year. 🙂

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